Break

Isn't it about time I get my holiday?

/

Solitary is what I crave for most days, times where I can tune out and not listen or try to please anyone, to just relax and do what I want.

I crave.

Belong

I want your Monday morning

sleep soaked eyes

dream drenched voice,

lazy bones

‘five more minutes please babe.’

I want your Tuesday afternoon

coffee break,

glasses off,
laughter on

‘just hold me for a while

it’s been a hard day.’

I want your Wednesday evening

fingers through hair

teeth nibbling nails

neck craning, 
eye glazing

‘this paperwork never ends’

I want your Thursday night

drinks for two

bones unbind

muscles let loose

flats, slacks,

‘just me and you’

I want your finally Friday

stretch soul smile,

sun sipping light

from the glaciers in your eyes

fingers unfurl, 
hand extends

‘c’mon babe, lets go wild’

I want your weekend,
your movie marathon Saturday

reading by the fireplace

kissing in the blankets


I want your Sunday morning

orange juice and pancakes

white sheets, tender skin

hair like the Fourth of July

‘let’s not get out of bed today.’

I want your ordinary

and your stress, rest, release

I want your bad day and that terrible night

I want you drunk in my arms

forgetting the place but never my name

I want your lazy and your lonely

and your fist full of fight

I want you everyday

in every way

for the rest of my life.

- On Both Knees

New year, new start.

Time to know whether I'll make or break it.

Ok, I'm kidding. I'm going to make it, I fucking swear. 

2014

Here's my cheesy post to sum up 2014.


2014 was almost like 2013, except it was maybe 1.5 times better.

I think my favorite part of it was that I got to travel a lot, to places that's so beautiful that it's unreal. The worst part was that I've lost some "friends", though I'm not sure they're even friends to begin with but I'm just glad they're out of my life now. I'm thankful for those who've stayed, my constants, the quality ones.

I'm really excited and looking forward to 2015, because of my new job which I hope that I can make a career out of it. And no boys, just focus on my career though I know it's still too early to say that. So for 2015, I think all I want out of it is more firsts, more awesome trips, a healthier lifestyle and of course, more money.

/

Honestly, there's nothing you can say that I haven't already insulted myself with. But yeah, go ahead and try. Let's see what new shit you can come up with.

11:39 PM

Currently tipsy on my favourite poison because I can't wrap my head around what happened yesterday. What happened? What happened is that you're still the same condescending, rude, pretentious, lying asshole that you were 2 years back. I've never been able to pinpoint an exact moment where I felt enough warmth from you that lets me know that oh, this is why I like you so much. I've only felt.. dislike, disdain, dis-everything because all you've done is let me down, made me feel unworthy of myself and just, yeah. But despite everything, I still can't stop thinking about you, what you've done and what could have been done. I might like you alot, way more than I should, but I just hate your pathetic self right now.

So, anyways, the point of this article isn't to address the same lame problem I've had for the past 2 years, but more of, can I start over? Can I start to pick the people I want to stay in my life, to stay? Can I? Do I have that choice?

This is probably as honest as it can get.