I'll follow you into the dark

Being in this buang country, with the buang internet, I can't do much except read through my tumblr. It has like 371 pages worth of memories, both good and bad. Right now, I'm reading through the period where I just felt like dying and shit because of *. Phew, thank God everything's gone now and I'm SO much happier despite being here and all. But I just am happier.

Anyways, 38 more days to go and let me just say, having your period in this country, this dirty place, is not at all fun to do. I just feel disgusted 24/7 with everything but thank God, you're here to make me laugh whenever it's possible. And m&ms is just 4RMB, which is like 80 cents? Damn cheap comfort food. :)

But bad thing about being here is that my skin is so buang right now, I can actually cry. Argh, and my hair.. the curls are almost gone. It's wavy now and I don't think I trust the china hairstylists with my hair though it's cheap and all. Yeah. Oh yeah, I need to get new specs.

Guess that's all.

Sometimes.

I wish you wouldn't be so selfish because you're not the only one suffering. Trust me.. you're not the only one suffering in this situation. You don't know how homesick I am right now and how much I'd give to come back to the sunny island. I don't tell you because what's the point? It'll only make you feel even worse than what we're both feeling right now. But all that I'm asking from you right now is don't be selfish and know your limits okay?

Lazy Sunday

First week down, five more left in this dorm then one last one at Beijing. Today's Sunday so basically we lazed around before doing the laundry at the laundry room (totally troublesome..) then roamed around looking for lunch/dinner and guess what?

We found a puppy. It's now in the guy's dorm and it's ours. Freaking adorable.

But this still doesn't change the fact that I want time to pass asap so that I'll come home to you.

Day 5.

Everything's been good except I think I'm quite homesick now and I just can't wait to go back. 47 more days to go, till I can see you and hold you in my arms. For now, puggy will replace you.

Day 1

I fucking miss home and, seriously. I want to fucking go home and end my stay here. I miss everything so badly. Sucks sucks sucks!

Promise.

Love conquers all, including distance right? 2 months is nothing. Gotta have faith.

Alright, I guess this will be the last blog post before I fly off tomorrow. It's been such a wild March/April, filled with so much love and unexpected shits. Thank you for everything you have done for me, and sorry for giving you something that you didn't have to go through, if not because of me. I'll be seeing you soon. <3

Ps, don't watch limitless. bad ending = bad everything.

First and last.

Sleeping lesser than lesser as compared to when I'm working at Immedius Press. :/ Skin's also getting worst. But it's all worth it.

Happy 1st.

1 year ago.

Today's the first day of FOP and it was quite busy, running errands here and there and finally settling down at MLT1 for the briefing. Just 2 years, on the exact same date I stepped into SP for the very first time. Now instead of feeling nervous and all that shit, I'm quite comfortable with my surroundings. Yeah, time flies, so fast. 2 years.. so what is 2 months?

Walked home and saw the 9th storey guy but wasn't.. feeling anything at all because of you. I'm sorry for putting you through this because I know this isn't what you expected.. at all. But yeah. Sucks to be you seriously.

Today's probably the first time in so long that I've like actually fight for my love.

Don't regret it one bit. Sorry for the previous disappointment but I've lived up to your expectations right?

/

Everything is so hard. I hate them for talking, for judging but I don't blame them because I'd hate myself too. I honestly don't know what to do, in hopes of not making you hate me too.

Really.

Quoted from Xinyi which she quoted from me, "Losing that job, was probably one of the luckiest thing that happened to me since the start of April."

Right now, we're interning at school, under Shirlynn because we had to clock in 6 weeks and we got fired at the beginning of the fifth week. Working under/with Shirlynn is damn fun and slack and everything our previous company is not. But I miss Bing and.. okay yeah, only Bing.

We have to attend FOP from Mon - Thurs next week as Shirlynn's right & left hand, I'm the right because I'm always right. Yeah, hopefully nothing goes wrong during the FOP and we'll get the grades we deserve? :)

Went to get my flu jab just now, and he got his chicken pox jab. :/ I hate hate hate needles because the feeling of it poking into your skin is just disgusting and the feeling of the doctor pulling it out is.. worst. So yeah. At least it's over now. Settled my windows installation into my macbook too.

Last thing to do now is the packing for China and maybe I want to buy a coat for china. (But I doubt mum allows but fingers crossed?)

Shall go and eat my bnj's now because you're outside and I'm bored and I don't want to bother you because nowadays I just feel like such a burden. So much so that I just don't feel like I'm good enough. For you.

Bored

Celebrate

Went to have our bak ku teh at song fa + marble slab with ahbing and xinyiaiai. Feeling shiok to the max, then coming home seeing my BNJ's in the freezer.

Only thing's missing is you. But I don't want to wake you up. Tsk.

/ Oh fuck the moment I posted this, you texted. Heh.

Right now

I just feel like crying. If you ever come back by The Script is on reply and I can't stop thinking about leaving Singapore for Dalian. 2 months is no joke.

No freaking joke.

Thoughts.

From losing him to gaining you. From having this job and being fired before the designated date. I've never thought 2011 would turn out this way. Never.

What am I feeling right now? Like.. really fortunate and unlucky at the same time. Conflicted feelings.

Everytime you say you're lucky/privileged to have me.. I keep quiet because I know I'm the lucky one.

Tired.

Dover > Clarke Quay > Paragon > Cathy > Clarke Quay > Tiong baru > Pioneer

Legs died.

Me and you.

Haven't even 1 month but we've already made so many plans lasting up to at least August. Scary ain't it but it's me and you, so we can make this work.

Love you.

/ Fucking sad now cause like money's like water to me now. Spend and spend and no fucking earn. I feel like shit. Shit. Fuck this. No lunch for me tomorrow because I had 4 fucking meals today and it's not those small kind. And because it's really time to save money.

Must

When I'm in china, one thing's for sure. Diet.

Otherwise, everything's been quite lovely nowadays except times when I feel like killing you. But otherwise, all's great.