/

I thought last night was going to be one of those nights where I can't even get to talk to you properly before heading to bed, and it was.

But when I woke up, I saw three texts from you.

And I couldn't be happier.

I love you smelly,
xo

Lose my mind

It just seems like you're doing all that you can to forget me while I'm doing everything I can to make you remember me. This push and pull effect, who the fuck will win?

On and on and on

I don't know I feel happy now, maybe it's because I'm eating my milo ice-cream (freaking big cup of it and it's only $1, and it makes me less homesick), or because I have a new pair of shorts waiting for me to collect, or because I finally got my subjects to shoot for my EDS, or maybe because I finally realize time is actually passing quite fast.

Or maybe because the boy finally fixed his mic in his laptop so I can finally hear his voice but I doubt he's ever speaking to me because he's "shy". Argh.

Anyways, life is good but I'd rather spend it in SG with him and my family. Think I can never study abroad anymore... but that's good.

Feelings

Why does it feel like I'm the only one trying? I seriously don't know what's your problem. You say you miss me, but when I ask you when you wanna talk to me, you never answer.

Arghhhhhhh how much I love you is how much I hate you.

/ wanna kill you now la.

Adapt.

From this remaining days that I'll be here, I'll try not to care about you.

Even though we're official, but whenever you're fucked up, I'm fucked up too.

And I don't want to be fucked up.

/ And how the fuck do you want me to believe that you truly love me, when ignoring me is all you're fucking doing now? Grow up.

Because

with you, I can put down my pride and I guess..

that's how much I love you. Because if it was another else, I wouldn't give a fucking damn. So please, meet me halfway.

How many times?

I hate nights like this when I go to bed, hating both you and me.