I will never be

the daughter who don't disappoint
the friend who's loved
the girlfriend who's sensible

This major feeling of failure is just so overwhelming, especially on an occasion like this.

I've always felt like the loser friend, the one who's average at everything, the fat and ugly one. Maybe the reason why I don't value big celebrations is because I know it'll suck all the same in the end. My birthday, Christmas, and all the other dates. They just suck. Because they show me how much I mean to everybody who I hold close to my heart.

To new adventures.

So I've decided on my game plan for life like a few days back and tomorrow, the long step 1 is going to take place. I'm nervous cause I have no idea what to expect but I'm excited because I get to learn new things again and hopefully, I'll make it through for this one year and yeah, save save save. Oh! I'm scared too because I'll have so many firsts again. Oh well.